There's an ongoing discussion on mommy treats' page about a mother who was reprimanded by the SM guard for breastfeeding in public. You may not believe this but it happened to me as well.
Last Friday, we were at SM Davao. We were doing some grocery shopping and the kids wanted to ride the carousel and the train ride. However the carousel was down so they rode the train instead. By this time, my 3-month-old son was crying 'cuz he was hungry. I always bring a nursing cover with me, whether it's a shawl, a boncho or a nursing cover. There was no chair in this part of the mall. The only thing near the train ride was the stairs so I decided to sit there. If you live in Davao or have been to SM Davao, you know what I'm talking about.
So I was feeding my baby, with cover and all, when a guard came near me and told me not to sit there. I said, "saglit lang po. Nagpatotoy ko." (Just a sec, I'm breastfeeding). Then the guard said, "Bawal man gud maglingkod diha ma'am." "Didto lang ka sa breastfeeding station magpatotoy mam." (Sitting on the stairs is not allowed. You can go to the breastfeeding station to feed your baby.)
At first I felt ashamed. I thought breastfeeding in public (in SM) was not allowed. Only with my son did I have the guts to breastfeed in public and what did I get? I got reprimanded for it. That was what I thought at that time.
Having read of a similar incident stirs again my emotions on that day. It made me realize that breastfeeding in any public places should not make me feel ashamed of myself. I am not alone.
I am a mother. I got ignorant of my rights as a breastfeeding mother. Good thing there are a lot of resources online that tells me of such. One of which is from Chronicles of a Nursing Mom. I hope you read this too. Discrimination with breastfeeding mothers should be stopped. And everyone should be educated about breast milk and breastfeeding. Some mothers may not like it but we should have the right to breastfeed whenever and wherever we want.
Are you serious? I think that's incredibly rude. Women should have the right to feed their children when they need to be fed. Hay...
ReplyDeletehttp://wonderwomanrises.blogspot.com
that's why they have breastfeeding stations... i dont think it was rude. it is not discrimination as well
ReplyDeleteI'm not being aggravating here when I ask what was his tone? He sounded helpful actually. You know, like, "Ma'am, you can't sit on the stairs kasi it's loitering. How about you try out our breastfeeding station so that you'll be more comfortable?" is what I hear.
ReplyDeleteKasi yung sa Megamall case, sinabi talaga ng guard na bawal mag-breastfeed. Yung sa SM Davao, ang sabi niya bawal umupo sa stairs. But if his tone was threatening, well, ibang usapan yun!
grabe naman yan?pati sa davao din pala..what a shame on them. "kung sila kaha"..hmmpp.. So far i haven't experienced any incident here in our place..hope the management will do something about it.
ReplyDeletePoint well taken po. But since my baby was crying and my kids were riding the train ride, I could not leave them. Add to that I have 3 strollers full of grocery items. I could not just leave where I was sitting and go to the second floor and walk a 100+ more steps just so I could sit in their "uncomfortable" breastfeeding station. Plus he saw the 3 strollers full of items.
ReplyDeleteTheir station was a bit far from where we were. And if his intentions were to point me to their breastfeeding station, he could have been more polite. He was talking to me as if it was such a big fault to sit their and breastfeed my crying baby.
Mind you an old man was sitting there too but he did not reprimand him. He was only talking to me!
Ma'am Frances, I seem to have deleted your post. Instead of pushing 'Publish', I pushed 'delete'. Can you send me your post again po?
ReplyDeleteThat's awful. These SM mall guards really need to be educated on how to address mall patrons about breastfeeding protocol.
ReplyDeleteblogged about this here (my response here kasi was getting too long, might as well turn it into a blog post:
ReplyDeletehttp://www.mecasmom.com/2011/12/shame-on-sm-management.html
the one who got reprimended in sm megamall is actually a friend of mine. can't believe they even brand themselves as a breastfeeding friendly mall.... shame.
ReplyDeleteshocked naman ako sa incident na to, im an SM mall patronage simply because they have breastfeeding station, SM Marikina and SM Taytay., and other Sm malls,,im not aware na bawal mag pa BF sa other places of the mall, maybe because i havent tried it.. anyway my concern is these "What if ur baby is hungry na and cant wait to go to their bf room,,, what they will do to you?? huhulihin ka at ikukulong??OA nun ah,,,
ReplyDeleteIn SM Taytay,I had a bad experience, I was going to Bf my baby and they have diaper changing station inside their bf room, so i was relief.. suddely the nurse went inside and reprimand me that diaper changed is not allowed dn na lang daw sa CR.. grr i was furious talga i said dapat di na kayo naglagay ng diaper changing station dito kung bawal pala,, Whats the purpose of it?? and then i calmed down to BF my daughter,, and walkaway thereafter.
Hi Ann, I left this comment in Chronicles of a Nursing Mom,then felt that I should post it here too. I am from Davao and I go to SM every week. I find the breastfeeding station way too far. Two years ago I had to breastfeed my son in front of the grocery (where Shoti Squid Balls is) and an SM lady came up to me and told me that I can go up to the breastfeeding station and feed my son there. She was polite and calm and so willing to help. Since my son was distracted and was not willing to "hide" inside the nursing bib I decided to take the SM lady's advise and walk to the breastfeeding station. When I got there it was closed! I always see people in the stairs near the train specially in the afternoons. Why were you asked to leave?
ReplyDeleteHe told me that it was prohibited to sit on the stairs. I was willing to obliged with that because I've seen instances when people were told not to sit on the stairs by the guards. (That shows how frequent I go to SM).
ReplyDeleteBut he saw me breastfeeding. Why couldn't he have gave me a few minutes to feed my son? I wasn't offending anyone, I was covering my son while feeding. It didn't take too long because the ride was over soon and my baby has fed enough and didn't like being covered.
Just because they have a breastfeeding station, does not mean that I have to feed my baby there and only there. As as you have said, the breastfeeding station is way too far. In fact it's located in their extension building.
I have fed my son at the department store and grocery area before. I always get that certain look from other customers and even the SM staff, but never have anyone approached me and told me to use the breastfeeding station up until that day.
ReplyDeletethis is a very unfortunate event. My girls and I, age almost 3 and almost 10 months, is at SM Davao during most days. The blessing or curse of living very near SM, I always oblige when Ate Gabee asks to go so she can ride the carousel or if bunso Andee needs the hustle and butle of SM to put her to sleep. I breastfed my first one until she was a year and half and I now breastfeed my 2nd one, most of which, happens in the said mall when we are out. Ive breastfed them at the grocery by the Senior Citizen or Prestige benches, at McDonald's, Bigby's, Foodcourt, Dept Store, when there used to be benches in front of Ace Hardware or Bodyshop. Practically everywhere really except at the Breasfeeding station. Because of 2 things. It's way out there and to get there, i would have to pass by the Bingo area where you can still smell the stench of cigarette smoke. Lucky me, never has anyone approached me to tell me it is prohibited to breadtfeed where I please, when I am being discrete. Lucky them that no one has tried or i would have handed them the screaming snd kicking Andee.
ReplyDeletei'm one with frances here. i think the guard might have meant well--maybe he was just trying to tell you that you'd be more comfortable nursing in the breastfeeding station. and some sm malls are really strict about people sitting on stairs, i see guards reprimand 'tambays' quite often. my nanay's house is a short stroll away from sm manila and i've breastfed freely around the mall.
ReplyDeleteIf that was his intentions, he could have been nicer. Plus he already saw me breastfeeding as he was just approaching, why couldn't he have given me a few minutes to finish. I don't think it would hurt him or any other customers if I just sat there for a while and feed my crying son. And the look from the second guard was unnecessary.
ReplyDelete